There's a design to what I did and said (word_waterfall) wrote in thirteenfiction,
There's a design to what I did and said

Title: Alone

Based: On the Movie ‘Thirteen’

Ship: Evie/Tracy

Written by: Word-waterfall

Summery:  Jealousy will drive me mad. A Tracy point-of-view-fiction.  Second One shot in a series of one-shots.

”You can’t leave me here!” I cry, grabbing at her shirt. She looks at me, then looks at the black boy next to her, smiles and leans in- kissing him with a small passion. My stomach flips, I want to throw up. Jealousy will drive me mad.


She turns back to me “”Yes I can” She grins, popping some gum into her mouth “”You’ll be fine” She pushes a stick of gum into my hand, wiggles her fingers and turns around, taking the boys hand. I drop the gum.


“”Evie!” I call after her “”Evie!” She doesn’t turn around. I push my hands over my eyes; end for a moment a stand on the en of my thoughts. If I the world can’t see me, I can’t see the world. It doesn’t work. She doesn’t run back. She left me here. I’m still here. Stuck in downtown, music thumping all around me, drunks roam around me, shouting at each other. A police siren blares somewhere, and a fight erupts at my size.


I run forward, only succeeding in bumping into a homeless man in a ratty suit. He stank of vodka.


He grabbed my top “”Have you heard the story about the randy old salesman, and the girl that was willing to do anything” He whispers harshly in my ear, I gasp- pulling away, I’m running as fast as I can. And for a moment I am back, Tracy, Tracy who signed her ‘’I’s with love hearts, Tracy who was vulnerable and did well in school. Not Tracy with a pierced tongue and low trousers. Not Tracy in the eyeliner. The Tracy I hated so much was back.


I pushed her to the back of my mind, squeezing my left arm tightly so my cuts sting and split, the pain refreshing me. I am Tracy. Evie’s best friend. Evie’s best friend who didn’t care if she went off with sleazy boys.


I do care. I care so much. I care that Evie is off doing things without me. I care that she doesn’t care. I care, and it hurts. I can’t hate her, because I love her. Desperately. She is mine. As much as it wasn’t true.


I start to run again, running as fast as I can, running through the red district, running to the edge of town, running. An arm grabs me from behind, I spin around, ready to scream, but my breath stops in my throat. It was Evie.


“”Hey” She smiles, pushing a pill under my nose; I take it into my mouth. She takes my hand “”Hey, Babe. Have a good time?”


I hold back tears, running my tongue around the powdery pill, swallowing it willingly.


Anything to take me away from this, this life where everything hates me.




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